My face is taller now. It was much shorter earlier in my life but has grown alot over the last few years. I don't like it. As a matter of fact I never really liked it. It never looked good enough for me. I had someone once tell me I had bedroom eyes but that's a different item. If I could go back to those days of yesteryear, I'd tell myself I looked pretty ok. My face wasn't movie star material but I look acceptable in photos from then. I should have accepted what I had and not worried about my handsomness factor. I would have been less shy.
Andre Aggasi was concerned about his looks. His face grew taller than mine at an early age. So much so that he had fake hair in his twenties. It looked good probably because it was long and flowing when he played tennis. He doesn't have much hair now but he looks good. Real good. I'd like to look like him but I've decided that what I have is enough. When I'm seventy and my face lengthens to the upper back half of my head, I won't look as great as I do now. I'll see pictures of myself taken in my more hansome years and realize even though women didn't chase me down I need to like my face now. I'm starting to.
It's been said that God knows the number of hairs on an individual's head. I think people lose their hair so He doesn't have to keep track of so many. I'd be more comfortable now though if I still had my younger number.
2 comments:
It is interesting looking back on life and how we perceived it. It is more interesting to look back and see how others perceived us or did not perceive us.
Several points to ponder in that regard:
1) I always thought you were good looking, just really shy, so I am surprised to some extent about how you thought of yourself.
My husband and I took water color painting for several years from the same person and one thing we learned from the class is we are always our own worst critic. She does excellent work and gets paid for it in addition to the classes but there were some of her paintings she threw away because she did not like them.
I believe this "worst critic" holds true in all of our life including how we think of how we look to how smart we are or how talented we are.
2) I am very impressed with your drawings. I do not remember your artisitic talent from school but as I look back I did not see a lot of the things going on around me. I am sure as an artist you find you pay more attention to your environment than many of the people around you.
My husband and I are always looking at the colors of the world around us and how the shadows from trees and bushes affect the color. I think his paintings are far better than mine and he thinks mine are better. Neither of us will ever get rich from our artwork but we have fun doing it and it has improved how we look at life and the world and people around us.
I can see you look hard and long at the world and see details no one would have ever noticed like the lady's hat. You seem to capture life and do excellent at people. I do not do watercolors of people even though I would like to be able to.
I do like photographing them. I also like sitting in the airport during my travels and watch people.
3) As for hair, there are varying degrees and perspectives about it. My youngest son has been losing his since his late teens. He had to have it short in the Marines and has resolved if he keeps it in a military cut no one will notice if it were longer there would not be much to see. He is happy with it and no longer notices there is not much there. His current girlfriend and most of the prior ones did not notice or care either.
I lost some of mine earlier this year due to some drugs I had to put up with for a period of time. What I lost was only noticeable to me (and my hair brush) but I noticed it regularly. Most others could not tell. My old habits from the 50s and 60s with puffing it a bit helped to disguise the loss as mine was more uniform across my head. It is growing back and I don't have to puff it as much.
I see people going through chemo who have lost all their hair and realize how my slight loss was nothing in comparison to them.
I see women with long think hair and wonder what it would be like as mine has always been thin. I have been blessed with 3 grand daughter with varying thickness and color and curl. I have learned that each of them wants what one of the others has and not what they have. So as the saying goes "the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence" or the hair is always better with what someone else has.
Life has taught me that what I have in hair is the best for me. At this age I am not about to get it changed anyway.
Thanks for the comments Phyllis. I was painfully shy. It took a very long time to work through it. I remember you as a very busy soul and very intense.
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